Here are somemore pointers from my great "bedtime read," How to be a Lady: A Contemporary Guide to Common Courtesy.
"At a cocktail party or a seated dinner, if a lady discovers that she has put something unpleasant, or unpalatable, in her mouth she gets rid of it in the most efficient way possible. In most cases, she simply uses her fingers or her fork. She works quickly and does not even attempt to disguise her actions behind a napkin."
(Now haven't we all wondered what do to in THAT situation?! I know I have - and here we have it . . . get it out of your mouth quick!)
"A lady does not crunch her ice." (guilty)
"A lady does not raise her voice when angry. (guilty again) It is only proper to shout at someone when he or she is in danger or about to score a touchdown."
"A lady never mentions her monthly cramps, except to the closest of friends."
Monday, April 28, 2008
Another Installment: How to Be a Lady
Posted by The Dinner Belle at 3:11 PM
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6 comments:
well, I guess we all know not how I am not 'a lady' I also have to add that a motto I like is one of a bumper sticker I recently saw and it read: 'Well behaved women rarely make history' and my personal favorite that I use often and it goes ' Never ask for permission, if need be, ask for forgiveness' This works in almost EVERY circumstance. Sorry Tom.
O.K. what's up with the finger and yucky food in the mouth?! I say go with napkin. Finger in the mouth, totally obvious! And as for cramps, who else do we complain too? ... our BFF's of course, our husbands surely don't care!!!
"or about to score a touchdown..."
Classic!
~A
Those are great. I agree with Nic- use a napkin. I am definately guilty of the others.
i am definitely not a lady. i always say too much and too loudly.
Matt and I laughed so hard we cried when we read this. Matt was convinced you had made them up so we found the book on Amazon.com. What really killed us was the reviews. With only a couple of exceptions the readers were really looking for this kind of advice! "A lady knows when it is okay and not okay to drink through a straw" and "a lady always wears fresh and clean underwear". I think I'll join your sweetie on the porch with my own overalls, rockin' chair, and some lemonade. I figure I can drink that with a straw, right?
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